I'm just a sober girl living in a drunk world. In recovery since 6/13/16. I am a lover of Christ and a striving Proverbs 31 woman. She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy. I will share with you my rants, raves, passions, and my journey in life. My problems are big but my God is bigger. I hope to inspire you to be the best version of yourself that you can be and to live the calling that Christ created you for!
As much as I would love to say that I have a great devotional life, I will admit...that is a lie. I mean I read my Bible, and I pray, and I read devotionals but just like everyone else, I get busy and I get distracted and I get sidetracked and my reading list ends up falling by the wayside. I know that God knows all the things I have in my life to do, I don't need to make excuses to Him. But I do need to be accountable for my own excuses and be honest with myself and with Him. Christ makes time for me so the why shouldn't I make time for Him? I've said this a few times...2015 for me is all about changes.
Let's face it...life gets in the way. We say we are going to exercise, go on that diet, read a book, hang with friends, etc, etc, etc, but then life gets in the way and we find every excuse in the book to put off what we know that we need to do. If you're anything like me, procrastination could literally make you a millionaire if you actually got paid for it. We have stuff going on. We have jobs, school, kids, our kids school and activities, marriages, television we love to watch, meals to cook, bills to pay, and the need to fit glorious sleep into it all. If we want to have a good relationship with Christ we have tomake the time. We cannot just expect it to fall in our lap. He is just waiting on us. He is there, all the time, any time you need Him. He's not going anywhere. But if we don't make time to meet Him and talk with Him and spend time in His word, our lives will suffer. It is imperative not only for our earthly life but especially for our Heavenly life and Salvation that we make time for our Creator!!
I know this information may be a bit TMI (too much information) but I am going to be real with you to show what works for me when it comes to making time for the things I know I need, and want to do...
Typically my morning routine consists of getting up, dragging myself out of bed, dragging myself to the coffee pot to turn it on, dragging myself to the bathroom to do my morning "bidness", dragging myself into the shower, sluggishly putting on my face, getting my son up, doing my hair and getting dressed, packing lunches, and draaaaaaaging myself out of the door. Doesn't sound like a great start to the day does it? I am famous for checking all my social media sites while I do my "bidness" in the morning. My friends will tell you..."she checks her Facebook or texts, and even calls me while she poops". *Shrug*, it's just what I do. :)
I have been thinking about ways I can make more time in my day to spend time in God's word. I've been really wanting to push myself to make time for the important things in life and lets face it, Facebook and Twitter are really not that important. So, instead of checking my social media in the morning, I have been reading my devotional. Instead of checking my Facebook and trying to read some article while I do my hair, I have been playing praise music on YouTube. I mean I still sneak in the occasional peek of course but I've been really trying to discipline myself out of that habit. Life is about habits and we either have good ones or bad ones. The only way to change bad habits is to replace them with good ones.
My 2015 Devotional is Solid Ground by Mark Finley, and it's so far, phenomenal!
I know that this plan isn't fool proof and I know that I will fail but the important thing is that I keep trying and I keep making the effort to make time available for God. I continually pray for His help in reminding me that I need to put my phone down, and pick up His book instead. My days have started out much better because of this. My attitude is different. I don't drag as much now as I push. Instead of feeling defeated about the day ahead, I am hopeful and I am feeling much happier and so much more inspired!
If you're having trouble finding the time to fit Bible Study or Devotions into your day consider these couple options:
1. Do you have a reading age child that you drive to school, to after school events, etc? Have them read your devotional to you while you are driving.
2. Do you have a job where you can listen to music or watch movies during the day? I process so I am able to plug in my earbuds and drown out the world. Consider downloading devotions or the Bible onto your iPod and worship while you work.
3. Do you have a CD player in your car or a CD player you can put in your bathroom? Consider purchasing Devotions on CD and listening while you're getting ready in the morning or while you drive to or home from work. Here are a few that I think look really interesting and by some of my favorite authors...and huge bonus...they are really reasonably priced and when you're done you can always loan them out to your friends :)
In my description you see that I say that I am a "striving Proverbs 31 Woman". What does that mean you might wonder? I aim to tell you... I ran across a website a few years ago that immediately captured my heart called Proverbs 31 Ministry and they are women who strive to be Biblical, loving, caring, Godly wives and mothers. They provide daily devotionals, inspiration, books, and advice for the every day mom and wife to become closer to Christ and more Christ-like in practical in their/your every day lives.
Proverbs is one of my all time favorite books because wisdom is at the very heart of the book of Proverbs. Most of the book was written by King Solomon, whom God blessed with the gift of great wisdom. Proverbs allows us to delve into subjects as varies as money, relationships, folly, adultery, child-rearing, contentment, and choosing good companions. Proverbs is in my opinion one of thee most practical books of the Bible because its full of messages that apply to our every day lives no matter what decade we live in. The book is literally a treasure trove of advice. Godly wisdom is one of life's most important and valuable pursuits, worth much more than material wealth. People can choose to read this book monthly, one chapter each day, to be sure to keep the lessons learned at the front of their minds. If you have never read Proverbs I strongly encourage you to do so and if you are a wife and mom specifically Proverbs 31:10-31 which talks about The Wife Of Noble Character. While I am in love with these particular books of Proverbs, I know that the entire book is critical in applying Godly wisdom to every situation in every day. I grew up reading and memorizing Scripture. It's incredibly important for us to spend time in God's Word because the Holy Spirit speaks through us. We can pray for wisdom until we're blue in the face and we can ask for the Holy Spirit to speak through us but The Holy Spirit cannot and will not speak through us unless we take the time to memorize Scripture and have it hidden in our hearts and available for when we need it. We are going to encounter many situations on a daily basis where we will have a chance to witness to those around us. If you don't already have Scripture hidden in your heart then what are you going to draw from when it's time to witness or when it's time to defend or stand up for what you believe and claim to live? Bottom line, what I am saying, is that we have got to memorize versus that back up our claims for our Christian lifestyle and so that we understand what we believe and why we believe it. Having Scripture hidden in our hearts will seep out into every single faucet of our lives. Not only is it important and critical but it makes us happier. I want to help you memorize Proverbs so I've picked out some of my favorite versus for your Scripture reading plan and memory verse plan for 2015. I PROMISE you that by memorizing these simple and practical versus, your life will change. You will start relating to people and situations in your life differently because you will be able to apply these to your life very easily!
Once you decide to read through Proverbs and memorize these Scriptures and find the ones that you love the most I would love to hear from you on how they affect you and how you've been able to apply them to your life. Please...I love to hear from you!
As sinful human beings born into a sinful world it is a natural reaction to think negatively. Our minds are hard wired to detect and dwell on negative events and circumstances. There are so many things in the world to be negative about right? Life isn't easy and in fact a large majority of the time it's just downright hard. No one wants to go to work. No one wants to pay bills. No one wants to struggle to get through the day with annoyances like other people. We have an evolutionary imprint called the negativity bias or the instinct to have a greater sensitivity to negative events rather than positive ones. This is why the Bible talks so much about our minds and taking control of what we think and how we speak.
So how can we overcome this negativity bias? How can we kick negativity to the curb and be positive, happy, and inspirational people? I have a few ideas if you'll entertain me... 1. Throw them out, literally.
Have you ever written a letter to someone and burned it instead of actually giving it to them? Have you ever journaled? Have you ever written a message and put it in a balloon and sent it up in the sky or put it in a bottle and threw in in a river? It's the same premise. Write down your negative feelings and thoughts about people or circumstances and then rip them up and throw them away. There is a psychological premise behind this. There was a study done at Ohio State University where a group of people were asked to write down their negative thoughts on paper and then throw them in the garbage. Another group was asked to keep the pieces of paper with the negative thoughts. Researchers discovered that by throwing away the negative pieces of paper it literally helped discard the thought mentally. However you perceive your pieces of paper, whether trash or worthy of keeping, makes a difference in how you use those thoughts.
2. Express gratitude and thankfulness.
I was able to find approximately 74 verses in the Bible that talk about expressing gratitude and thankfulness, giving praise to God and speaking positively. One of my favorites is a memory verse from childhood that is also a song we used to sing in praise and worship..."This is the day the Lord hath made; let us rejoice and be glad in it" Psalm 118:24.
Our memories are not carved in stone. We choose what we remember. Our minds are awesome creations that allow us to block out certain memories because of trauma or other negativity, or to magnify them them. By concentrating on negative memories or thoughts we begin to ruminate about them. Ruminating on the negativity will harden our hearts eventually and we will turn into little balls of anger. Fortunately, our minds are able to express gratitude and by expressing gratitude we are able to remember positive memories and we are even able to transform negative memories into positive ones. We are mentally able to turn negative into positive. Negative cannot live where positive lives, just like darkness cannot live where light lives. John 1:5 says, "The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it".
3. Get rid of negative people.
Let's be honest here, people are annoying. Whether it's our parents, our children, our co-workers, our boss, the person standing in line in front of you at the store, some guy in the car next to you, or a neighbor. Life is full of annoying people. We're human beings and we do and say annoying things. But there is a difference between those people and the general annoyances they bring to our lives that are easily manageable and the people who deliberately do things and say things to bring negativity into our lives. We have to create boundaries in our lives and learn to say no to negative people. We do not have to tolerate people in our lives that bring us down, make us feel bad about ourselves, speak badly to us and about us, or make us feel that we are unlovable. We do not have to tolerate people to are constantly negative to us and towards us. It doesn't matter how close someone is to us, whether family or friend, you have to define your boundaries and you have to stick to them. It's ok to cut negative people out of your life. You do not have to allow them to dull your shine for one more day. When someone begins speaking negative words, walk away, cut off the conversation, and teach them that you will not tolerate that in your life. They will either change their behavior or they will remove themselves from your life because they will realize you will not entertain their negativity.
4. Stop complaining.
It's easy to complain about things. That job you hate, the bills you have to pay, the annoying neighbor, the paper you have to write, the laundry you have to do, etc, etc, etc. When we complain we create un-necessary negativity because we're speaking negative words. I'm not saying it's easy. I'm probably the worst about complaining. But I've tried it, and I've realized that the minute I open my mouth to complain and I think before I speak and just stop the words, I instantly feel better. There are things in life we just don't want to do but we have to. There is no getting around going to work if you want to have a roof over your head, food on your table, and clothes on your back. Same with paying bills. Laundry doesn't fold itself and if you want to get a good grade, you do your work and that includes writing your paper or taking your test. There really is no reason to complain because we're lucky enough to even be alive every day to have something to complain about. When you start to complain, just stop and think about someone who has it worse than you.
5. Don't engage in negative social media.
Negativity is all over social media. Facebook is chocked full of negative news articles and negative people posting negative complaining comments. I have fallen victim too many times of seeing a negative or ignorant post and commenting on it or re-posting it and the snowball effect is just amazing. Before long I find myself de-friended or blocked by someone or de-friending and blocking someone out of anger and then later feeling bad about it and wishing I could take back what I said. It's super easy to fight with people when you're hiding behind a computer screen and typically the things we say to each other on social media, we would never say to the person if really standing face to face. Delete the negative friends who constantly complain. If they're really your friend they will understand that you're trying to make changes in your life and not take it personally. In fact it may even challenge them to make some changes too. It's easy to re-friend someone. Delete or "un-like" negative pages that spew nothing but negative articles that promote racism, negative politics, anti-religious speak, etc. Those are my personal triggers so you need to be specific about your triggers. Just get rid of them. It's not worth your time. The best gift you can give your friends and family is your happiness and the more of it we spread on social media the better. Choose happiness and positivity and spread that stuff all over social media! It's contagious!
I know that none of this is easy. These are all things I struggle with daily. I know however that I have to try. And that's all you can do too. The truth is, we will never be completely free of negative thoughts or people. We don't necessarily need to be because negative thoughts and emotions are a natural part of the human condition. In fact, a healthy dose of negativity can be just the kick in the pants you need for change. Acknowledge your negative thoughts, embrace them, and thank your brain for communicating with you, but take steps to at least change your relationship with your negative thoughts. Don't live another day letting negative thoughts or people control you, your attitude, or your emotions because it's far to easy to control them!
Raise your hand if you've never been hurt or offended by someone....
Crickets....Crickets....Crickets....
That's what I thought. We've all been hurt. We've all been wronged. We've all been cheated. We've all experienced that hot knife of betrayal. We've all had some sort of experience at the hand of another person that has crushed us. We've been cheated on, we've been lied to, we've been stolen from, we've been talked about and slandered, and bullied. It hurts. I get that. Emotional pain is one of the hardest things to get past because it's extremely easy to let that pain fester and build into anger and resentment and we easily allow the thoughts of revenge into our minds and hearts. What we do with that hurt is more important however that the hurt itself. Would you prefer to wallow in that pain and constantly demand answers and spin your wheels in memories that you cannot change or would you rather live your life free of emotional pain and break the chains of bondage that the past can keep on you?
The Blame Game
Blaming other people for our hurt and emotional pain is typically the first place we start. Somebody did something to wrong us in some way that really mattered to us. We want an explanation and we demand an apology. We want them to acknowledge to us that they've hurt us and then we demand that they explain all the why's and what's of what they did. We beat them over the head with their offense. Blaming other people will only in the end leave you powerless. Sometimes there are no answers for the reasons people have hurt you. Typically people don't even realize in the moment that their action is going to hurt you or betray you. And typically, the person hurting you, has also been hurt. Hurt people, hurt people. When you continually blame people you give them the power. When you confront the person and demand answers that they don't give you, you are left with anger and hurt and no resolution. Your feelings are legit. You have a right to feel them, they are important. But once you have felt those feelings, you need to deal with them and then move on. Nursing your grievances against another person is a bad habit and it hurts you more than it hurts them. Most of the time when you're still setting and blaming them and hurting over their offense, they have moved on and aren't even thinking about you or what they did to you.
Stop Playing the Victim
Being the victim feels good. It's like being on the winning side of the team of you against the world. Guess what? The larger part of the world, doesn't care. Ouch! I know. That hurts to hear. It hurts to think that the world doesn't revolve around you and doesn't constantly think how you think, feel how you feel, or hurt how you hurt. You just need to get over yourself. Yes, you're special. You matter. Your feelings matter. Your hurts matter. But don't confuse "your feelings matter" with "your feelings should override all else, and nothing else matters". You and your feelings are just one small part of the grand scheme of things and you are interwoven into this big complex and messy world. You, and you alone have the chance and choice every minute, every day, every week, and every year to continue to feel bad about other person's actions, or to start feeling good and feeling happy. You need to take responsibility for your actions and your life. You have the power over your own happiness, and not to put such great power into another persons hands. If they're no longer thinking about what they did to you then why would you give them such great power of living in a past with them where they are no longer living instead of living right here, right now, in the present? Stop playing the victim of the past and look forward to the future.
Forgive...even if you can't forget
There are a million cliches about forgiveness and let me tell you something...they are all true. Forgiveness doesn't excuse the person's behavior. Forgiveness doesn't mean you are weak. Forgiveness doesn't mean that you forget about what happened to you. Forgiveness isn't for the other person, it is for you. Forgiveness lets the past be in the past. It releases you from the bondage of hurt feelings and past offenses. It releases you from the person that hurt you. You don't forget. You will always remember. Those hurt moments in your life shape you and contribute to your self worth, your esteem, your decisions, and your future. You remember that experience that happened and what you're supposed to do is learn from it and not make a bad choice or decision again. What you're not supposed to do is let it hold you hostage. What forgiveness does is softens our hearts to the fact that not one person in this entire universe is perfect. There was only one perfect person that walked this earth and that was Jesus Christ. When you are hurt and offended and want to hold the past against someone or beat them over the head with the "sin" they committed against you, ask yourself one simple question....What Would Jesus Do? When we sin against God all we have to do is ask Him for His mercy and forgiveness and His grace and it's done. He takes those sins and He throws them into the depths of the ocean and He never thinks of them again. "You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl our inequities into the depths of the sea" Micah 7:19. Forgiveness is a way of empathizing with the other person, and trying to see things from their point of view, and ultimately, having mercy on another person. You may never get an apology from the person that wronged you. You may never get an explanation. You ultimately have got to live your life with an apology you may never get.
Be Accountable
Express your pain, your hurt, and your anger, when you are able whether it's directly to the person who wronged you, or whether you write a letter you never mail, or whether you journal the pain, or whether you pray about the pain. Get it our of your system and then move on. Stop bashing the person over the head with it. Stop asking the same questions over and over. Stop expecting things you will never get. Getting it out will help you understand what specifically you are hurting about and then allow you to take accountability for your own part. Are you holding onto a grudge that you need to let go? Were you part of the problem? We don't live in a black and white world, even when it sometimes feels like we do. While you may not have had the same amount of responsibility for the hurt you are experiencing as the person that hurt you, there may have been a part of the hurt that you are also partially responsible for. What could you do differently next time? Are you an active participant in your own life, or are you simply a hopeless victim? Will you let your past and your pain become your identity or are you someone deeper and more complex than that? Are you withholding joy from your life and others lives because of the pain and hurt you feel or the offense against you? Are you robbing others in your life of you because you can't get past something that happened to you? Take accountability for your life and your actions!
None of this is easy stuff. I know it's hard. I am as guilty as the next guy for holding grudges and recycling offenses against me like little reels of tape in my mind. But pain, if held onto for too long can soon become like an old friend. Justified. Like it would be catastrophic if you just let it go. Grudges create little holes in your heart that allow Satan to walk into like an open door and fester and grow until your heart is so black that no joy and no thought of better life could ever possibly be possible. Living this way is not the life that Christ had planned for you. Your Creator did not design you to live in the past. By holding onto things that cannot be changed you are not living for Him. Satan wins by keeping you offended because if you are offended you are not being active for God. You cannot live God's will if you are resentful and hurt and angry. Nobody's life should be defined by their pain. It's not healthy and it's not normal. It only adds stress to our lives and it hurts our ability to focus, to study and to work, and it impacts every other relationship we have. Every day you choose to hold onto the pain is another day everybody around you has to live with that decision. Living in the past and holding onto that pain has consequences for you and everyone around you.
Remember, if we crowd our brains and lives, with hurt and offended feelings, we have very little room for anything else, including joy. It's a choice you're making to continue to feel the hurt rather than welcoming joy and contentment into your life. No amount of rumination or analyses has ever fixed a relationship problem. Never. Not in the entirety of the world's history. Stop dwelling on things that cannot be changed. When your past comes calling...HANG UP THE PHONE!
Before I begin on this blog I have a confession to make...
I am not a very good blogger
Not because I don't have anything to say because those who know me...know I have A LOT to talk about. I currently have 6 drafts saved of things I want to write about and I have lists saved on my "notes" app on my phone of things I want to share with you all. When I approached one of my favorite bloggers and friends (Tattooed Martha) about possibly starting a blog she of course gave me all the encouragement in the world because I kept telling her how much I wanted to do it but that I thought I wouldn't be able to dedicate enough time. She just kept telling me that I should just do it and to do as much as I could. I am thankful for that advice because it drove me to actually create this blog and although I haven't put as much time in it as I want, I know it's always here for me. I could call it procrastination I suppose. With all these ideas in my head I should be flooding this thing. But instead of blogging I watch my favorite tv shows, or I sleep, or I do something else, anything else really. I do have a really good excuse that with school and the once a week 1200 word paper I have to write, finding time to write here is just taking a back seat. Someday...that won't be the case but for now I am blessed that I can find some time every now and then to get some things off my chest in this format and that I have all of you to care enough to keep visiting to read what I have to say.
New Year Resolutions
The one thing about New Years that I don't like is those pesky resolutions. Everyone makes them every year and I think it takes all but a few weeks and we get bored with them or find them too hard and we give up. I would love to be able to make some resolutions that I can actually keep. I don't think resolutions are necessarily bad but like goals we need to make sure they are reachable, attainable, measurable, and realistic so that we don't find ourselves in that same rut of giving up before we've even started. I really want to make 2015 a year of changes. There are going to be changes in my life including graduating with my Bachelor's in Human Services Management, starting my Master's in Christian counseling with a focus on addiction, moving from this negative place I've been living in for far to long, and hopefully advancing in a few different area's. These are physical things that are going to happen but there are also emotional changes that I would like to make in my life as well. My hope is to blog about a few of them but for now I would like to share with you a few of the goals that I have set for the year....
1. I don't have to comment on respond to every ignorant or taunting Facebook post I see on my thread, or any negative or unrighteous talk in real life. Walk away.
We do not have to entertain or engage into every argument we're invited into and let me tell you, there are a ton out there. I find myself getting into some of the stupidest arguments and debates with people on social media because I just can't resist giving my opinion. I need to learn that my opinion is mine and that not everyone needs to hear it or wants to hear it. I need to choose carefully my words when interacting with others so that I am a blessing to them and not another hindrance in their lives. Arguing with people over issues that I know I'm not going to change their mind over, just adds frustration and bitterness to my life. In 2015 I am going to make a very conscious and purposeful effort to not do this because it's just a a waste of time and emotion.
2. Thanking Jesus every morning. I am a prayer. I believe in prayer. I write down my prayers, I pray for other people. I talk to Jesus all day long in my head. I don't however make a habit or have a purposeful thing of thanking Him the minute I wake up and my eyes open. Instead I open my eyes and I growl or I complain to Him that I don't want to get up, or that I am tired, or something about something I don't want to do. I've read so many things about how our mind is a battlefield and we have the best weapon in the world and that is our Savior and I know that by thanking Him the minute I open my eyes instead of complaining is going to set a very different tone for my day.
3. Ridding my life of negativity and negative people. There is so much negativity in the world. There always has been but it's gotten worse in my opinion over the last few years and a lot of it has to do with social media. Everyone has a public voice now and no one (including me) seems to have a filter or have a regard for how their words can be a weapon against other people. We wonder why kids bully each other and we're heartbroken when children will actually take their own lives because of how they are treated by other children but looking at how we as adults talk to and treat each other, it's honestly no wonder. There is something psychological and physical about how we talk to ourselves and to other people. The Bible talks a lot about this and how our tongue is a weapon that can either build someone up or tear them down. Speaking negative words about ourselves to our selves, or speaking negative words to other people and about other people is a weapon that tears down and it's my goal this year to stop doing that. I also plan to get rid of the people in my life that cause negative feelings. If you don't have anything positive to contribute to my life, get out of it because I'm going to be about growing and thriving and I have no time for you. Negativity is just something I don't have time for this year!
Those are just a few of the things I have planned for myself this year...what resolutions or goals do you have ? Do you have a plan or a map for the year that you can keep these goals?
I have refrained from saying or posting anything about Robin Williams death because I really didn't know what to say, and still sort of don't, but I'm gonna give it my best shot. I have grown up with this man listening to his comedy, watching his movies, and being inspired by his bright and shining attitude when dealing with his alcoholism and drug abuse. He has entertained us for so long and has been a source of happiness for so many people and bam, his life is just gone. Snuffed out. Way to soon. And by suicide of all things. Suicide is something that is so terrifying to me because I can empathize. I admit that I have had times in my life where I have contemplated suicide because it did seem easier to just escape than to deal with the, at the time, overwhelming emotional trauma. But, thank GOD, I knew that it wasn't the answer and I was able to reach out from that despair and realize that action would hurt the people that love me far more than it would solve any problems I had at the time and that stopped me. I have suffered from depression and anxiety/panic for a large part of my life and so have several of my family members and my friends. It's something I struggle with everyday in silence and I realize that so many more people than me suffer every day as well. My prayers and thoughts are with Robin's family and his friends, and with all of us who loved him as an entertainer. I don't know the demons that Robin wrestled with as he slipped that belt around his neck but I pray that Jesus was with him as his life slipped away. I pray that Jesus is with his loved ones now as they mourn his loss and try and reason through the instant feelings of the why's, the what if''s and the deep anger and sadness that is sure to plague them for months and years.
Depression/Suicide/Mental Illness
I refrained from saying anything right away about this loss because when something like this happens, I get so incredibly annoyed with how all of sudden everyone on Facebook or other social media think they are an expert on suicide/depression/mental illness etc. Everyone has an opinion and they are sure quick to express it. I think until you've truly experienced something you can't speak for someone else and really shouldn't try to speak for someone else, ever.
I read a blog written by Matt Walsh published August 12, 2014 called Robin Williams Didn't Die From a Disease, He died From His Choice that really bothered me (he has since published a follow up after receiving thousands and thousands of angry responses) Depression isn't a Choice, But Suicide Is. Normally I agree with about 98% of the things he writes but this one about Robin really just struck me because as an up and coming addiction and mental health professional I felt that it was extremely uneducated, off the cuff, un-called for at the moment, and harsh towards mental health. It bothers me that there are people in the Christian community that seem to just ignore the facts of science and brain chemistry. While as a Jesus Freak Bible thumping Christian I firmly believe that all mental illness is ultimately caused by sin, I am not naive enough to think that prayer and prayer alone can solve all of it's issues. I say that from experience. I have prayed for a particular person in my life for years and years regarding their mental illness and at times I've seen improvement but ultimately it goes back to the illness taking over. This person refuses to admit that they have an illness, even though it's clear to so many around them. I have prayed for myself in battle against my panic attacks and my bouts of depression and what I feel I have been led to by the hand of God is to seek therapy and intervention of medication.
What I do and don't know from the Christian Perspective about Mental Illness/Depression
I am not an expert, I am not a Doctor, but I do battle it, I do feel it, I do suffer from it so I know enough about it that I can at least speak from my own experience. I do know that I have a chemical imbalance in my brain that causes me to have panic and anxiety. I do know that if I am stressed out my symptoms get worse. I do know that I battle depression and I know that I can control my depression by talking to a professional that can help me work through the issues that are causing it. I do know that medication greatly helps me keep all of this under control and I do know that I am NOT ashamed of my illness or the fact that I take medication to control it. I think the only shame in anything is when a person refuses to do anything, or refuses to admit that they need help because of pride or fear. I think that depression and mental illness have to be treated in a holistic way where mind, body, and spirit are all intertwined and treated together. We as a society have got to stop marginalizing mental illness as something that isn't a true and real disease. I think that far to many times the Christian community blames mental illness on satanic oppression/depression and makes people feel ashamed for having this illness because, they "must not have a good enough relationship with Christ or you wouldn't be sad all the time".
I think that people don't seek out the help they need or deserve because we as a society have made people feel ashamed by it. So many people have the feeling that they don't need some counselor coming into their life and telling them what is or isn't wrong with them. Or that seeing a counselor is something to be ashamed of. Mental illness has been criminalized because so many homeless people suffer from it and are homeless because of it and for some reason this society thinks that being homeless is a crime. Prison's are filled to the brim with people who suffer from mental illness and addiction and are not treated correctly or treated at all.
As Christians, it is our duty and responsibility to take care of and to care for the mentally ill, the addicted, the homeless, the poor, and the widowed. We as Jesus Freaks should NEVER EVER make someone feel guilty, ashamed, or less than or accuse them of just not praying hard enough or having a good enough relationship with Christ. Just because we are believers does not mean that we are immune from sin, develop chemical imbalances, depression, anxiety, or any other mental illness. Being a believer in Christ does not make you immune to these things and in fact makes you more vulnerable because the whole world expects you to be perfect and happy all of the time.
Death/Suicide
Death itself is such a hard thing to comprehend. I have three people in my life now that have died from deaths that really didn't make an sense to me at all. I understand death. I know that it has to happen. I know that we can't live forever in this earth but only can live forever in Christ. I am not afraid of death itself, like my life actually being done and over but the process of death is something that scares me and scares most people. I'm an not afraid to die because I know that when I do I will wake up to the face of my Savior (Psalm 23:4), but how I die, well...that's a pretty scary thing to think about. Death leaves a void in the hearts of the living, it leaves questions, especially with suicide, and it leaves questions on what is next. As a Christian I know that when we are saved in Jesus we have nothing to fear, including death because we get to go home with Him. I know that when I die I am asleep (Ecclesiastes 12:7)and that I do not suffer (John 11:11-14) and that I do not haunt. I know that when I die I will not watch over my loved ones and I will not visit them either in their sleep or when they are awake (Ecclesiastes 9:5-6, 10) and I know that nothing including death, can keep me from Christ or His love (Romans 8:38-39).
As a child I remember being told that suicide was the ultimate sin, that taking your own life was something that was unforgivable. As an adult I found that that is NOT a Biblical idea and there is nothing in the Bible that says that someone who takes their own life will not be in Heaven. But there are many versus that tell us how we can cope with feeling suicidal and that we are not alone (2 Corinthians 4:8-9) no matter how dark our future may seem. We are valuable to God (Luke 12:6-7), that God thinks about us and cares about us ALL of the time (Psalm 139:17-18) and that Jesus Christ will help carry your burdens that you feel are too heavy to carry on your own (Psalm 55:22). There are people from the Bible who thought of suicide and who did actually take their own lives (Numbers 11:14-15).
My Final Thoughts
Fellow believers and lovers of Christ...STOP your ignorant thinking and preaching that depression and anxiety are not real diseases or illness. STOP your ignorant behavior of teaching and preaching that someone does not need medical attention for their mental illness. STOP preaching and teaching that ALL people need is prayer or God in their lives. There is more science to depression, anxiety and mental illness than just a relationship with God. STOP shaming people in to believing there is nothing wrong with them.
To the depressed, suicidal or mentally ill what I know is that depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts or even attempts, are nothing to be ashamed of. I do know that suicide does NOT solve your issues, they only take your life and leave those who love you in despair. I do know that no matter how hard it seems, no matter the struggle, your life is worth more than that hardship and that you CAN overcome it. You CAN!!! I know that I love you, that your family loves you, that your friends love you. I know that your life is valuable even when you feel it isn't. I do know that you are not beyond help, beyond saving, or beyond loving and that you deserve to be loved and to have someone, anyone, lift you up and make you feel like you are valuable.
If you are depressed or suicidal PLEASE reach out to someone, anyone, ME, your Pastor, your parents, your teachers, local police or medical professional. Please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.
If you recognize someone who maybe suicidal or in need of help for their depression, PLEASE, don't make them feel like they are just acting crazy. Take them seriously and educate yourself on depression and suicide at The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention Take this seriously and do something about it instead of just ignoring it or thinking it's all in their head because while yes, it's in their head....but I doesn't have to be. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure!
If you know me you know that I am a born and raised Seventh-day Adventist and if you don't know me, well, now you know! I have been taught since the day I was able to speak and understand words that my people are a special and peculiar people that are specially hand picked to be God's remnant people to carry out certain prophetic messages.
The first thing you need to know about SDA's....(throughout the rest of the blog I will refer to Seventh-day Adventists as SDA's for short) we're not a cult. Yes, we don't eat pork, yes, we don't believe in ghosts, and yes, we worship on the original Biblical Seventh-day Sabbath. No Ellen G. White is not our "Pope" but she is a confirmed and accurate Prophet and co-founder of our church. We are a 100% Bible believing doctrine and there is not one thing that we believe or practice that isn't Biblical.
This blog isn't necessarily supposed to be a "what do you weirdo's believe" but more of a current events update and how they apply to End Times. So, if you do have more questions about SDA's please feel free to leave your questions under the comments section, email me, or just click on the link above and do your own heartfelt and spiritually lead research.
The SDA world is in a buzz lately due to the events unfolding around the Catholic Church's new Pope. I wanted to just reflect on those and give my thoughts for those who are unaware of the relevance of these actions and to serve as a reminder to my SDA brothers and sisters that the time is drawing near for Christ's return.
So, to start just a bit of history. SDA's and the Catholic Church are on just about thee most opposite spectrum of doctrine as you can get. SDA's have always and still believe that the Sabbath will be the final battle between Satan and God and that the choice of whether to serve God or serve Satan will be the ultimate taking of the Mark of the Beast (666). There have been Sunday Blue Laws on the books in the country for thousands of years but SDA's are probably the only doctrine that has payed any attention to them because of our belief on worshiping on the true Biblical Sabbath.
If you are SDA then Revelation Seminars are nothing new and in fact are ingrained into your mind. Daniel and Revelation are played out in front of you at least once a year showing the unfolding of End Time events and how our church and the United States will play it's particular part. What does the Bible say about the Sabbath day and when it is? The fourth Commandment: "Six days do your work, but on the seventh day do not work, so that your ox and your donkey may rest, and so that the slave born in your household and the foreigner living among you many be refreshed". Exodus 23:12
Let's just get to the bare bones of the matter...The Roman Catholic Church changed the Biblical Sabbath of Saturday to the "Lord's Day" of Sunday. Their Catholic Catechism clearly says this and any Priest you talk to will most likely have knowledge of this change. The reason for this change from the Sabbath of our Lord to Sunday, the day of the sun worshipers occurred due to two reasons, one was a desire to avoid being identified with the Jews, whose bigotry and downfall had make them unpopular and two, an equally strong desire to win the pagan sun worshipers and gain their adherence to the church. Our belief is that this departure from faith will be the great falling away or apostasy that will ultimately disclose the sin of man who opposes and exalts himself above all that is called God, or that is worshiped. This action of enforcing Sunday worship will come from the Antichrist and cause the world to take the Mark of The Beast by choosing either with their mind or with their hand to worship on Sunday instead of God's created Sabbath, Saturday.
You are at this point probably saying, "what, the Catholic Church changed the Sabbath? How? When?". Well let me prove it to you...
The earliest Sunday law known to history was that of Constantine promulgated in A.D. 321. It reads: "On the venerable day of the sun let the magistrates and people residing in cities res, and let all workshops be closed" (Haynes, 1928). I could go on and on about Constantine and the many Pope's of his day and the days that follow but let's get to the actual black and white proof from the current Catholic Church.
Haynes (1928) stated, ""Sunday is a Catholic institution, and its claims to observance can be defended only on Catholic principles...From beginning to end Scripture there is not a single passage that warrants the transfer of weekly public worship from the last day of the week to the first" - August 25, 1900"" (p. 46).
In 1893 the Catholic Mirror of Baltimore, MA, was the official organ of Cardinal Gibbons and in its September 23rd paper said, "The Catholic Church for over one thousand years before the existence of a Protestant, by virtue of her divine mission, changed the day from Saturday to Sunday". "The Christian Sabbath is therefore to this day the acknowledged offspring of the Catholic Church as spouse of the Holy Ghost, without a word of remonstrance from the Protestant World" - Catholic Mirror as pamphlet, The Christian Sabbath (pp. 29, 31).
There is also a paragraph in the Catechism that states under the heading "Cooperation by the Civil Authories Regarding This Commandment..."The civil authorities should be urged to cooperate with the church in maintaining and strengthening this public worship of God, and to support with their own authority the regulations set down by the church's pastors. For it is only in this way that the faithful will understand why it is Sunday and not the Sabbath day that we now keep holy" - The Roman Catechism (1985).
Believe it or not, they have even went so far as to remove the 2nd Commandment regarding idolatry and moving the fourth Commandment in the rest of our Bibles, "Remember the Sabbath Day" Commandment to the 3rd Commandment. Yes, believe it or not, the Catholic Church has a different Bible than the rest of us Protestants. If you don't believe me, go to any Catholic book store and look at their Bibles.
Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days you shall labor, and do all your work; but the seventh day is a sabbath to the Lord your God; in it you shall not do any work.90The sabbath was made for man, not man for the sabbath; so the Son of Man is lord even of the sabbath.91
2168 The third commandment of the Decalogue recalls the holiness of the sabbath: "The seventh day is a sabbath of solemn rest, holy to the LORD."92
They go on to say on the same page....
The day of the Resurrection: the new creation
2174 Jesus rose from the dead "on the first day of the week."104 Because it is the "first day," the day of Christ's Resurrection recalls the first creation. Because it is the "eighth day" following the sabbath,105 it symbolizes the new creation ushered in by Christ's Resurrection. For Christians it has become the first of all days, the first of all feasts, the Lord's Day (he kuriake hemera, dies dominica) Sunday:
We all gather on the day of the sun, for it is the first day [after the Jewish sabbath, but also the first day] when God, separating matter from darkness, made the world; and on this same day Jesus Christ our Savior rose from the dead.106
Sunday - fulfillment of the sabbath
2175 Sunday is expressly distinguished from the sabbath which it follows chronologically every week; for Christians its ceremonial observance replaces that of the sabbath. In Christ's Passover, Sunday fulfills the spiritual truth of the Jewish sabbath and announces man's eternal rest in God. For worship under the Law prepared for the mystery of Christ, and what was done there prefigured some aspects of Christ:107
Those who lived according to the old order of things have come to a new hope, no longer keeping the sabbath, but the Lord's Day, in which our life is blessed by him and by his death.108
2176 The celebration of Sunday observes the moral commandment inscribed by nature in the human heart to render to God an outward, visible, public, and regular worship "as a sign of his universal beneficence to all."109Sunday worship fulfills the moral command of the Old Covenant, taking up its rhythm and spirit in the weekly celebration of the Creator and Redeemer of his people.
The Sunday Eucharist
2177 The Sunday celebration of the Lord's Day and his Eucharist is at the heart of the Church's life. "Sunday is the day on which the paschal mystery is celebrated in light of the apostolic tradition and is to be observed as the foremost holy day of obligation in the universal Church."110
"Also to be observed are the day of the Nativity of Our Lord Jesus Christ, the Epiphany, the Ascension of Christ, the feast of the Body and Blood of Christi, the feast of Mary the Mother of God, her Immaculate Conception, her Assumption, the feast of Saint Joseph, the feast of the Apostles Saints Peter and Paul, and the feast of All Saints."111
2178 This practice of the Christian assembly dates from the beginnings of the apostolic age.112 The Letter to the Hebrews reminds the faithful "not to neglect to meet together, as is the habit of some, but to encourage one another."113
Tradition preserves the memory of an ever-timely exhortation: Come to Church early, approach the Lord, and confess your sins, repent in prayer. . . . Be present at the sacred and divine liturgy, conclude its prayer and do not leave before the dismissal. . . . We have often said: "This day is given to you for prayer and rest. This is the day that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it."114
2179 "A parish is a definite community of the Christian faithful established on a stable basis within a particular church; the pastoral care of the parish is entrusted to a pastor as its own shepherd under the authority of the diocesan bishop."115 It is the place where all the faithful can be gathered together for the Sunday celebration of the Eucharist. The parish initiates the Christian people into the ordinary expression of the liturgical life: it gathers them together in this celebration; it teaches Christ's saving doctrine; it practices the charity of the Lord in good works and brotherly love:
You cannot pray at home as at church, where there is a great multitude, where exclamations are cried out to God as from one great heart, and where there is something more: the union of minds, the accord of souls, the bond of charity, the prayers of the priests.116
The Sunday obligation
2180 The precept of the Church specifies the law of the Lord more precisely: "On Sundays and other holy days of obligation the faithful are bound to participate in the Mass."117 "The precept of participating in the Mass is satisfied by assistance at a Mass which is celebrated anywhere in a Catholic rite either on the holy day or on the evening of the preceding day."118
2189 "Observe the sabbath day, to keep it holy" (Deut 5:12). "The seventh day is a sabbath of solemn rest, holy to the Lord" (Ex 31:15).
2190 The sabbath, which represented the completion of the first creation, has been replaced by Sunday which recalls the new creation inaugurated by the Resurrection of Christ.
2191 The Church celebrates the day of Christ's Resurrection on the "eighth day," Sunday, which is rightly called the Lord's Day (cf. SC 106).
You can find further proof from a video straight from the mouth of a Catholic official...
If you understand the Bible and you understand God's promise and word to us and if you understand Satan and his purpose it's obvious. But, if you don't, I'll help in form you. From the very beginning of the controversy between God and Satan, it's been Satan's purpose to overthrow the law of God. In doing so Satan has perverted the doctrines of the Bible, and errors have become incorporated into the faith of thousands who profess to believe in God and his Word. There is a battle between the laws of men and the laws of Jehovah, between the religion of the Bible, and the religion of fable and tradition. Thousands of people have come to deny the very doctrines that are the pillars of the Christian faith. Many ministers and priests are teaching their followers, their faithful sheep, that the law of God has changed the law that he came to fulfill. God did not send Jesus Christ to die on a cross to change the law, but to fulfill it. "Do not think that I came to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I did not come to abolish but to fulfill. For truly I say to you, until heaven and earth pass away, not the smallest letter or stroke shall pass from the Law until all is accomplished". Matthew 5:17-18. It is the claim from many "Christian" leaders that the enforcement of Sunday observance would greatly improve the morals of society. The claim is especially urged in America, where the doctrine of the true Sabbath has been preached. It's the goal of these ministers and church leaders to convince you that they are laboring to promote the highest interest of society and those who refuse to unite with them are denounced as the enemies of temperance and reform. So why do I go on and on and show you all of this proof? Who cares what day we worship? Well there are two articles that I found posted today from my own church website and also from national news.... Towards Global Law Sunday and Pope: No Work Sundays good: Not just for faithful. This has HUGE significance to the SDA because we have been predicting for thousands of years that from the change instituted by the Roman Catholic Church that eventually Sunday would be something that is required, not just observed. This small (or not small to us) move or statement made by the Pope is just a glimpse of what is coming. All that it would take would be one significant world disaster and the Pope along with the United States Government could call for "peace, peace" and ask that the world stop and worship God (which is great except) on one specific day. That day will end up being on Sunday because the greatest of all things that Satan the Father of Lies wants is for God's people to forget the day they were created and made to rest and worship on a day that was never meant for them. "Jesus said to them, "The Sabbath was made for man, and not man for the Sabbath. So the Son of Man is Lord even of the Sabbath". Mark 2.27-28. White (1950) stated, "We may disguise poison by mingling it with wholesome food, but we do not change its nature. On the contrary, it is rendered more dangerous, as it is more likely to be taken unawares. It is one of Satan's devices to combine with falsehood just enough to give plausibility" (p. 587). My point in telling you non SDA's all of this and in showing you all of this proof is in hopes that you will question your faith, that you will question the doctrine that you've been taught your whole life, that the "traditions" of this world of worshiping on Sunday will be questioned and that you will question why you've been doing this your whole life. My desire is not necessarily that you will convert to SDA tomorrow, although that would be great, but that you just start to look at your Bible and what it says in a different way and that you will question it, question God, question your Minister, question your church and your church leaders. Delve into it yourself and ask yourself and talk to God about the truth He has been showing you for thousands of years. Keep a close eye on events that unfold about this Pope and what he has to say about the Sabbath day. Keep an eye on our Presidential administration and how the start to work with the Catholic Church, and just be observant with an open mind. I can promise you that you will see things that you never thought of before and never thought possible. My point in doing this for those of us who are SDA is to once again bring this topic to your attention and the importance of following what we know to be truth and showing it to the world. There is an old joke that I love, just because you have a car in your garage, doesn't mean you are a mechanic. And another, just because you set every Sabbath in a pew, doesn't mean you are a Christian.We have to stop setting in our pews each Sabbath preaching to each other. We have to stop thinking just because we were born and raised this way, or for some converted to this way, that everyone just knows the truth and we can just set complacent and just preach to ourselves. SDA's, the world is looking for something right now. They are looking for a leader. Things are BAD. People are asking questions. They are looking for someone to step up and show them what to do, how to live, what they can place their hope in. We are it. We need to stop preaching at people and start preaching to people. Christ is coming. The Second Coming is near and He is going to be looking for those of us who will stand for His truth even during persecution and tribulation. This world is a disgusting vial mess and there will be a time very soon that our beliefs are going to be questioned and we have to stand up with good reasons why we are doing what we're doing. We are going to be persecuted and thrown in jail for our Sabbath worship. Mark my words. We are called to be set apart from this world. Our lives are in constant question. We have to not just say it but show it. We can't convince everyone, but we may be able to convince a few. References: White, E. G. (1950). The Great Controversy (5th ed.). Battle Creek, MI: Pacific Press. Haynes, C. B. (1928). From Sabbath to Sunday. Hagerstown, MD: Review and Harold. Reid, G. E. (1996). Sunday's Coming. Hagerstown, MD: Review and Harold. All other references are linked.
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